The Worry Eater
Leighton Schreyer
it was a grubby little thing, a stuffed animal
of sorts, striped olive green & kinder-chocolate
brown with a flat face that doubled as its body,
stubby arms & stubby legs & wide-set eyes,
a blood-red zipper as its mouth.
the worry eater loved to feast
on your fears & frustrations, to fill its belly
with the fantasies of your mind; the monsters
under your bed & the ones in your closet—
the despicable devil always dancing on your back.
if what it touted was true, then you could be free
of your worries in just three simple steps: 1. write
down your worries, 2. pop your worries
into the worry eater’s mouth, 3. zip it up!
perhaps it’s saying something
that my mom thought a worry eater,
not a beyblade or barbie doll (the kinds of toys
typical twelve year olds played with)
would make me happy. as if learning to
swallow my worries
would somehow also solve them. & i tried—
i really did—to swallow my worries. i dutifully
wrote them down, popped them into
my new friend’s mouth & zipped it up, the way
i was told i should.
& the worry eater kept
its promise, always
gobbling up my worries, always
swallowing them whole. so,
i fed it like a mother—
lapped up what dribbled & dripped down
its chin & wiped away the crumbs on its cheeks,
the credence of its crimes. i scolded
it for chewing with its mouth open &
taught it not to talk
with it full—manners were important
after all. the worry eater ate until it lost
its appetite but, by then, it didn’t matter anymore;
i had gained my own appetite, had turned
my own mouth into a drawer.
Leighton Schreyer
(they/them) is a writer, poet, and critically Mad queer activist in Toronto, ON, whose writing explores themes of gender, sexuality, mental health, and the human condition. Their work has been featured in some of the world’s leading medical and literary journals, including The Sun, The New England Journal of Medicine, Journal of the American Medical Association, Hippocampus Magazine, Redivider, and more. Their writing has been nominated for The Pushcart Prize. As a current medical student, Leighton is passionate about recentering the fundamental role that story plays in healthcare and caregiving, and about using narrative as a powerful tool to foster healing and human connection.